Monday, September 26, 2011

“Beware Of Computer Programmers Whistling Superhero Tunes.”

Well it’s a new week and I’m sure everyone that read last week’s blog is as been waiting with baited breath to see what happened when the IT tech showed up to fix the computers in our office. OK, so that’s probably an exaggeration but I hope your back to find out what happened anyway.

For those that have just joined us here, last week I wrote about our fabulous IT department. To get a real feel for the whole thing, you’ll have to read last week’s post. Either way here’s part two of the computer technician fiasco.

It had been nearly three days since I called the charismatic fellow at the IT desk to tell him my computer wasn’t working. He’d mentioned there might be a slight back log for repairs, since they had disabled several hundred computers; so frankly, I was shocked when a technician called to tell me he was on his way over. He asked if I could be there to meet him, and I told him I could if I rearranged a few appointments.

As soon as I hung up the phone, I went to work changing my schedule to free up the afternoon. Lunch time came and went. As did one, two, three, and four O’ clock and guess what; no IT guy. The next morning I got another phone call from the computer office again saying they were on their way. This time they asked for directions (Perhaps they got lost the first time). I told them I was at the fire department.

My answer was met with silence and the sound of rustling paper then the man said.

“Where’s that?”

Now this might seem like a perfectly logical question, except it just so happens we are the only fire department they serve… oh and we’re less than a block away.

“Walk out your front doors, turn left, then look for the building with the great big fire trucks!”

OK… I didn’t really say that. What I did was give him the address and hope he wouldn’t have to put it into a GPS to find the place.

Moments later he arrived, looking frazzled, and introduced himself as the department supervisor. At first I thought I was in luck. If anyone could help me here it would be this guy right; wrong. As I watched him work, I realized why our IT department had always provided us with such abhorrent service.

He sat down, hit the power button, and waited for the computer to power up. When the screen came on, displaying the code telling him the computer had been disabled, he looked at me with a straight face and said.

“Yup your computers down. I’ll have to go back to the office and get a disk so I can fix it.”

Then he got up, walked to his car, and left.

Now this should have been shock, but considering or history together, it didn’t surprise me at all. As he left I wondered what he would say if he called 911, and when we got there we said,

“Yup, that’s a fire. You’ll have to hold on while we go back to the station to get some hose.”

The IT pro got his disk and was back in a flash. He came in, sat down, put the disk in and… made a phone call. As he waited for the other line to pick up, he clicked the mouse nervously. I knew something was wrong.

The other party picked up.

“OK, I have this disk in. Now what do I do?”

I could not help but stare in disbelief. This was the head IT guy and he was calling back the office for step by step instructions. He would listen; type a few lines, then listen again, then type some more. After several agonizing minutes he got the process started, then stood triumphantly to announce it would be an hour before it was finished.

I sighed and agreed not to touch it. (God forbid I would cause another problem) and waited for it to go through its paces.

As soon as it was done the IT guy came back, apparently he did have that timed pretty well, and he sat down to log in. He typed his admin password and hit enter and… nothing. He did it again and again; still nothing. After a few more tries he called his office.

“Ummm, yeah,” He mumbled into the phone. “I think I forgot my password”.

I pretended not to listen, looking out the window so he wouldn’t see me laugh.

“No, I don’t remember... OK”

A few moments of silence went by, and I realized he was on hold, in the perpetual Barry Manilow limbo. I guess even the tech guys get this treatment.

A few more moments went by and he hung up the phone.

“I need to get some additional software from the office,” He said, as if I hadn’t heard the whole conversation. ”I’ll be right back”

Again he went, and again he came back. He put his new disk in the computer and; you guessed it, he called back for instructions.

On the up side, once he limped through the log on, it didn’t take long before he was in. I know this because as soon as he was successful, he whistled some obscure superhero tune. In fact, he was so happy, he did the same thing every time something went right.

Click, click, click… program loaded correctly, superhero tune. Click, click, click, password accepted, superhero tune. It was hilarious.

Another 20 minutes of his heroic efforts, and my computer was running again. When he was done, he stood, leaving as swiftly as he’d come, ready to do more good deeds. Unfortunately, I had to chance him down in the parking lot to give him back the password crack disk he left in my computer. Oh well, nobody’s perfect. What’s a little security breach between friends anyway?

So that’s my story. A little long winded but I hope you got a kick out of it. Until next time, happy reading.


  1. Okay, I laughed. You succeeded.

    Shees. I love them professionals.

  2. I wonder if IT people go to a special training on customer service because I have had the exact same experience. I love how they try to hide their lack of knowledge by appearing to be immersed in the inner workings of your computer. It's like a game.

  3. Hahahaha.
    I work in IT and yes, a lot of us are such pompous know-it-alls. You should see us when we attend seminars. Almost everyone would be in a hi-im-so-and-so-and-i'm-so-freakin-important-you-can't-even-come-close-to-how-great-i-am complete with an eyebrow raised as we size up potential competition. :D

    Great article, by the way. Let us know if the IT guy/dept does it again. ^_^

  4. @jwmanus Yeah. Love it when you laugh.

  5. @ Susan. Funny thing. They have training once a week. They even close the whole shop for it. What there actually training on is beond me!

  6. @Traveling reader. Love your post. FD is the same way. Everyone has something to say... Even when they have nothing to say!

  7. @Chuck Guess everyone does hold himself quite important, no wonder the attitude. :D

  8. Oh my goodness! After a brain-fart of a day I've had, this was just... sorely needed! Thank you! I'm sorry it was such a horrendous day for you, of course, but in the same breath, I'm so glad you shared it. lol.

    Also, thank you for the Add on Twitter! I would never have found your blog had you not!

    All the best,


  9. @Airicka. Was a bit of a rough day but these guys are so funny in their ineptitude the laugh makes up for it. Glad you liked the story. Hope to see you here and on Twitter again soon.

  10. "Yup that's a fire. You'll have to hold on while we go back to the station and get some hose."

    Lol. So sadly rampant in today's 'service' world it's not funny. (But your line is)

    Thanks for the great blog.
    Christine London

  11. It's whats-his-faces law. The one about how people keep getting promoted until they reach their level of incompetence.


  12. Thanks Christine. I agree, its funny how willing we are to accept mediocrity now days.

  13. No doubt Joyce. I think these guys are at the pinnacle of their career. To bad they topped out at the bottom rung.

  14. Fun post! I think I may have met that guy!

  15. Made me laugh. I'm here from twitter, making sure you're a real writer before following back. I write humorous SF/Fantasy for teens. This blog is more than quotes. You should change your twitter profile to note the humor & get more followers.

  16. Thanks Sher. Might take your advice. Good luck with your writing.

  17. Found you on Twitter, Chuck, and followed this. I think I can write comedy, but your I.T. guy is way out of my league.

  18. Very funny. I don't know what I would have done. Might have hosed him down with something by the second super hero tune...