Monday, August 29, 2011

“Don’t Judge A Valley Girl By Its Cover”

This weekend I volunteered at a 190 mile relay race to benefit one of my favorite charities. It was our job to man one of several changeover stations where these maniacs would pass the proverbial baton before running another 10 to 15 miles for their leg of the race. I myself would rather chew glass that put myself through that kind of torture, but I admire the tenacity (and sadism) of anyone willing to do it.

Our station was in the mountains of Glenwood Springs Colorado and our tour of duty, so to speak, was to be from 11:00 till 10:00. That is eleven at night till ten in the morning, not the other way around. It could have been the fourteen Red Bulls or the 5 hour energy chasers but around 3 am I was feeling pretty good, if not a tad jittery, and I started to hit my stride.

We were surrounded at this point by runners on every side and we were checking them in and out with all the efficiency of a whine’o hopped up on cold medicine. The teams seemed to arrive in groups, and as this particular crowd started to thin I heard a new team coming in behind me. From the sounds of them they were from deep in the valley of California, deep in the 1980’s valley. I have never heard so many likes and oh my gods in my life.

“I’m like hitting a mental wall right now”

“Oh my God do you need a hug or something”

“No like, I think I’m just like frustrated or something”

“Oh my God, we could like totally give you a pep talk or something. You’re like an animal. Like a totally ferocious tiger or something!” (Yes, they really said it)

So I’m sitting there with my back to them trying not to let out the 3 a.m. punch drunk laughter. Up to this point I hadn’t seen these girls, but I did, as I’m sure you all do, have an idea of what they might look like… and your wrong.

As I turned around I saw the three young women standing there. They were all African American women sporting dreadlock’s and gangster garb right down to the gold teeth. They looked like a Jamaican hit squad on the hunt.

Is there anything wrong with dressing this way? Absolutely not, dress however you want. Was it like seeing Larry the Cable guy give a dissertation on the future of Nuclear physics in Yemen? Yes.

I was left speechless. I stared at them and they stared at me. Then one of them raised an eyebrow and said, “Like what’s your problem?”

I lost it. I could not stop laughing. Luckily they were great sports about the whole thing. I would imagine they raise an eyebrow or two wherever they go. We chatted for a few minutes and they played up the valley girl slang. I’m not sure if they were playing a role for fun, of it or just living life outside the box. Either way I was glad to have met them. They reminded me that there are surprises around every corner. I don’t know where they finished, but I hope they did well, they were great girls and they definitely made my night go by a little faster.

What kind of surprises have you run into lately. I would love to hear em’.


  1. I really wish I had something incredibly profound to share with you,but my mind is stuck on what I just read from your post. I recently found you through twitter and had to drop by to say hello and follow. Thank you for making me smile today, I really needed that - like totally!

  2. LOL. Thanks Denise, I'm glad you liked it. I will look for your profound posts on Twitter!

  3. That is just too funny. You rarely find chicks rocking the Valley Girl lingo anymore. And the fact they are of urban persausion (the attire, not race) is even funnier. I love your Larry in Yemen example.
    And glad they were good sports about it too. Playing a role or not, it was pretty fgunny and wish I could see it. Then again I am a writer, maybe I can! ;)

  4. LOL. They would make a great characters in a book that's for sure!

  5. How funny! I'd have loved to have seen most any hour of the day except that one.

    What surprises have I experienced lately? Just the continuing curse that's been on my lawn, and everything to do with my lawn since the snow melted this spring. It's like OMG, like it's flooded again. OMG! Call the the lawnmower man because like OMG, the rider quit again and the grass is like getting really tall! OMG the neighbors probably think that like the Clampett's moved in. (LOL...sorry, couldn't help myself). :)