Monday, July 11, 2011

“Beware Of Computer Programmers That Carry Screwdrivers Part 2”

For those of you that are reading this blog for the first time, you might want to go back in the history and catch the first edition to this story. It will make part two a bit more relevant. For those of you that have read part one, or just want to start now, here is another great chronicle in the life of my departments tech support.

So my boss comes to me this morning with dreadful news; his computer stopped working. I suppose the news that his computer was shot wasn’t all that bad, but it meant I would have to deal with tech support, and that could always make a bad seem day longer.

After trying a few quick fixes myself, I decided I’d better just unhook it and take it over to the tech office personally. Anything would be better than listening to another rendition of “I Write the Songs.” by our old friend Barry.

When I got there I was met by a kid looking to be about the age of 12.

When I say met, I mean he looked at me, then at the computer, then back at me. Then he pushed a trouble ticket across the counter, tossing a pen in behind it for good measure. I asked the jovial little fellow if I should fill it out, and he nodded with a grunt then disappeared around the corner.

It took me about a minute to fill out my name, address, and issue, as described in the instructions, then I got to wait about fifteen minutes for the kid to come back. I would have been irate but I was in luck. The wait came with a show and it was so good I had to share it with all of you.

While I waited, I watched two other technicians work in the area behind the counter. The phone rang and one of the technicians picked it up. He listed to the caller for a few seconds then gave the standard answer we all know from part one; say it with me…

“Ummmm hold on a second.”

I got a little chuckle from the answer then I waited eagerly to see what was going to happen next. As soon as Techie 1 hit the hold button, he leaned over to Techie 2 to ask her for another technician’s extension. Well call him Tom.

Techie 2 rattled off the extension then went back whatever she was doing. Techie 1 got back on the phone, transferred the call then hung up. Less than a second later a phone rang in the next cubicle. Techie 2 stands up, walks over to the empty cubicle and answers…

“Tech support, this is Tom’s office can I help you”

I could not help but laugh out loud. They had just transferred a call to a desk three feet away then answered it themselves. You would think this would be the end of the idiocy but there’s more.

Techie 2 listens to what is undoubtedly the same thing Techie 1 just heard 5 seconds earlier, then gave him the standard…

“Ummmm Hold on a second.”

Techie 2 puts the caller on hold and peeks out from behind the cubicle.

“Do you know where Tom is?” She says.

“No, I think he’s coming in late”

Techie 2 gets back on the phone, pretends to take a message, then hangs up. She walks back to her desk, goes back to work and neither of them say another word.

About this time, my technician drug himself around the corner to collect my computer, and I left astounded that neither of the other technicians found their actions strange. I still don’t know if they performed the ritual on purpose, or it they had no clue of what they’d done. Either way I went back to my office laughing, hardly able to wait for evening to come so I could write this blog.

Have a great week and happy computing!!


  1. Loved your story. If you can believe it, I got my 1st pc (Toshiba laptop) in May 2011. Installed free Avast anti-virus protection. 1 week later, I got a virus. Couldn't log onto internet. Called my service provider. Told him I just bought the laptop & ready to throw it out my home office window. He said, "Tell me where you live, I want to be there when you do so I can grab it". Assured me it was fixable. A tech finally took the virus off & installed Microsoft essentials. All has been ok since aside from an occasional threat. Clean it & carry on. By the way, I used to scrimshaw. Made a ton of money. A fellow tweep is going to have me as a guest on his blog re: scrimshaw w/pics. If he doesn't do so within 1 month, would you consider having me on your blog? If you give me your email address, I will send pics of the scrimshaw. I am on Facebook also.

  2. Viruses are never fun. I will never understand why someone would try to destroy a total strangers computer just for the fun of it. Glad you got it taken care of though. Be glad to check out the scrimshaw thing too.